Beautiful day

new day; new world
ugly city with smiling sin.

You are free, you are flying
welcome to the revolution.

Lysergsäure-diethylamid-25

I've been taking acid on a regular basis (say, once a week or once a fortnight) for the past year and before that every month or so for the past two years.

Two nights ago I ingested approximately 1200ug of LSD in an ethanolic aqueous solution. The dropper bottle was quanted at 150ug/drop. I started with two drops to get a feel for it and within half an hour was having a bloody fantastic time. I felt molten, liquid and gooey. Colours morphing, tracers, the usual medium-strength trip effects. But, y'know, I had a whole vial left, so I took another drop. Things improved within 15min witht the addition of heavily brathing and warping floorboards and walls. I conferred with my trip partner and decided to get a bit silly (had final exam that day, wanted to celebrate). Five more drops. Got a phone call from a friend asking if I had any acid. Agreed to meet at the shops down the street, made him up a couple of cubes, two drops on each. Five minute walk. The deal is done, I have a toke of the shisha they have bubbling away in their car and start walking back. It is only after I realise I have been walking for a good half hour that I remember where i was going. My entire world is made up of geometric impossibilities, four dimension hapes crafted out of lasers, great nets of colours that don't even exist. Auditory hallucinations reminiscent of strong DMT trips. I pause, get my bearings and manage to make it back into the house. Getting the feeling that things are about to get very weird. Inside, put on my Hendrix collection onto the big speakers and collapse onto the floor with a blanket. Do not move for approximately 12 hours.

Anyone who thinks LSD should be illegal needs to be shot in the head.

A crisis of unconscience

Earning and honest wage... Digging a hole in reality and finding society at the bottom... Burning Bape hoodies, mescaline and anchovies... Eat the skin and shit the bones.

I'm finding myself drawn closer and closer to the notion of dropping out of university in order to pursue my writing. Chemistry is my love, it provides the Answers That I Seek, but I don't know if I want to work in a pharmaceuticals lab for the rest of my life.

I certainly wish to have a laboratory in my home, so that I can pursue my own research, but everything I've seen about the current academic bias (or lack therof) in Australia, and to a lesser extent, the world, suggests that getting anywhere in science basically consists of doing someone elses work for most of your life and then spending the erst of it begging for funding from a government that doesn't care or companies who want to put you on a leash as a pet chemist.

I certainly feel that I could discover something truly world-changing if given the chance. But... I can't do nine to five. I can do dealines so long asI can do them to death, if you know what i mean, really screw them against the wall until it's balls to the wire two-am scattered dribbling into a word processor, then crashing oput hard to wake up the next afternoon, half an hour before its due and faxing it off so your editor doesn't have enough time to proof-read or critique the damn thing before it goes to press...

That's not the kind of attitude that is likely to get me any tenured positions on any major publications, but it seems to be where I do my best work. At my own rate, up late, angry at my own reflection.

The last time I had to work to a deadline for a uni assignment I wound up ordering a pizza at three in the morning, asking for a large supreme with "anchovies, peyote and tabasco sauce", and then hit the delivery girl with a can of mace when she knocked on my door.

Good pizza, though.

The Nitemare Before Easter

It is hard to imagine how a concrete box full of people all kinds of fucked up on strange chemicals and music so loud you can feel your teeth blistering could be boring, but somehow FORCEWA manages it.

Clearly these people get something form their drugs I don't, because despite my best efforts (I personally was all fucked up on a bunch of mephedrone, glaucine, 1,3-DMAA and magic mushrooms) I just couldn't feel the vibe. There was no PLUR - There was just "Look at me, I'm a better dancer then you, I'm more fucked up then you, my girlfriend is a bigger slut then your girlfriend" ad nauseum

And nauseate it did, I spent a few minutes in the portaloos re-experiencing a double quarter pounder, which was potentially the most interesting part of the night.

i must say though, the one thing I expected to be the worst suprised me - I had assumed the lines for the 'loos would stretch all the way back to the gate, but in fact, they were suprisingly short. Guess everyone else just handles their shit better then I do -wry grin-

it's always good, though, to get those brief moments of chemically-induced humanity. First-time drug users dropping a killer pill and spending the night hugging their close friends, proclaiming total and unconditional love for the world and asking why they can't feel their legs anymore. Old-school DJs getting the crowd to eat out of their hand and MAKE SOME NOISE FOR THE XANDERRRRRRRRR!

it was a fun night, but given that I spend over $200 on drugs, taxi, food, entry and drink, and that I wouldn't usually even spend that much on a 48 hour doof which wis MUCH more enjoyable and spiritually fulfilling... I can't say I could justify doing it again. I probably will at some point, with longer-lasting chems, and I'll stick around for the whole night (I bailed at about 3am because I was coming down hard and I had work the next day anyway) and it might get better...

But I doubt it.

if you like the taste of pepsi better then coke, you have a shit palate.

Pepsi is coke for the MTV kids. It's oversweetened undercarbonated commercial-hyped beyonce-pumped garbage and about the only thing it's good for is pouring in the eyes of jews. Coke tastes like the roof of your mouth is wrestling with sherbert and steel wool. It's awesome.

If you honestly like pepsi better then coke you need to be spayed immediately.

This isn't like one of those XBOX vs PS2 fanboy debates where everyone has points for or against and it comes down to personal preference. it's a fact. Coke is better then pepsi. Atlanta says so. America says so. jesus says so.

Fuck your generation. My daddy drank coke and so will I.

transhuman/datastream.hallucinations __LOTEK//interfearence

• The drug hit him like an express train, a white-hot column of light mounting his spine from the region of his prostate, illuminating the sutures of his skull with x-rays of short-circuited sexual energy. His teeth sang in their individual sockets like tuning forks, each one pitch-perfect and clear as ethanol. His bones, beneath the hazy envelope of flesh, were chromed and polished, the joints lubricated with a film of silicone. Sandstorms raged across the scoured floor of his skull, generating waves of high thin static that broke behind his eyes, spheres of purest crystal, expanding...The anger was expanding, relentless, exponential, riding out behind the betaphenethylamine rush like a carrier wave, a seismic fluid, rich and corrosive.

We live in a world of war.

Wars on terror, oil wars, wars of attrition and ebay bidding wars.

war is human.

war is undying.

the will of many to stand for one ideal - To lay down flesh, bone, life and steel.

There are the wars you see on television every day. The war in Iraq. Gang wars.

and then there are the secret wars. Wars hidden in other wars - The War on Drugs; idealised to stop criminal profit, destroy organised crime, halt the flow of american money to afghani opium traders and their al quaeda handlers (or whicever particular facet you choose to embrace as the main, thrusting lance of the DEA)

The war on drugs is a front for the war on freedom.

The war on your brain.

You have the right to think what you want. To say what you want. You might not be able to do what you want to, but you can damn well think about it! So wherin, then, lies the crime of tinkering with ones own neurochemistry?

I am more then happy to allow the sale of powerful psychotropic substances by unlicensed individuals to be illegal - When did you ever go to a drug dealer, and the drug dealer said, "you know, you should come back tomorrow, this is not very pure." It doesn't happen. These chemicals are extremely powerful, and dangerous, and need to be handled responsibly. You are free to do whatever you want to your brain so long as you can stay in control of it and don't restrict, injure on contrain any other sentient individual.

As an interesting conjuecture; I realised what consitutes sentience the other day. What is the single factor of behaviour we as 'sentient' humans have that no other 'dumb' or 'primitive' base animal does?

Rational, sentient human beings are the only animal on this planet to put another animal in a cage, or ona leash, or into indentured servitude.

Your brain is your brain, control it and master it - But no others.

No human is innately born 'better' then another - We are all one conciousness, subjectively experiencing ourselves from a thousand different perspectives, a kind of gestalt crystal organ of inconceivable size and dimension. We precess at right angles to each other, perpetually forming new trajectories of view from which to experience this fractal morphology we resolve into three-dimensional images and jokingly call "Life".

All any drug amounts to is tweaking the incoming data. It does not make you evil. Takinga drug is not a crime.

Selling an impure drug should be a crime. Providing a drug to someone who is clearly incapable of maturely respecting and using such a chemical should be a crime.

This is legislation, already in place? Illegal moonshiners selling bootleg methanol-contaminated white lightning are prosecuted violently. The liquor store who supplies a minor with a six pack will face a hefty penalty if caught. During prohibition in america; over half the profits of domestic organised crime organisations came from illegal distilleries supplying dangerous, adultered spirits at uncontrolled cost and purity. Now, the alcohol trade is lucrative, government sponsored and responsible for a significant proportion of international trade, domestic tax revenue and booming entertainment and tourism industries.

Why is it so different, then, and why would it be so hard to implement government laboratories and factories to provide standardised, referenceable volumes and dosages of presently-illegal psychotropic substances, in a controllable manner? A clandestine ecstasy laboratory capable of outputting, say, 3000 pills a month would cost approximately $50,000 to set up and maybe a tenth that in chemical consumables every month. If Pfizer was subcontracted to produce MDMA in the form of pressed 120mg tabsules including glucose, dextrin and a microcrystalline binder (and probably some kind of professional taggant to identify the factory source); they could construct a facility capable of doing so and outputting hundreds of thousand of said tablets for a rough cost of less then seven cents per tablet - If each tablet is retailed at $10 each from approved, secured government contracted retailiers; no other organised crime group could possibly afford to manufacture in a) the same volume or b) for the same price. Nobody would be buying the more expensive, less effective, more dangerous pills that could get you killed, not when there were cheap, powerful, legal, clean and safe alternatives.

Now, clearly, such a facility woud first require intense research into the long-term health effects and ramifications of MDMA use. But then again, alcohol and tobacco, both of which have proven to be incredibly damaging in the long-term, are still being dustributed under a similar, government-regulated condition. The hypocrisy is deafening.

But then, that is to only examine such substances for recreational use. All any drug amounts to is tweaking the incoming data. You have to be incredibly self-centered or pathetic to be satisfied with simply tweaking the incoming data. They have the tremendous capacity for nootropis, mind expansion and cognitive enhancement - Not to mention their potential for use in psychotherapy and addiction studies.

There is always a point at which the terrorist ceases to manipulate the media gestalt. A point at which the violence may well escalate, but beyond which the terrorist has become symptomatic of the media gestalt itself. Terrorism as we ordinarily understand it is innately media-related. Remember that, the next time you say a "Not Even once' Ad campaign, or a newspaper article suggesting that a bin in which to throw illegal drug out would somehow encourage their use.

Free your mind, zombie. Wake up. Think about life. Do what you need to. Keep talking, keep moving. Never let the man keep you down. We are at war. We sing songs of peace and dance to love. And yet, we are treated with nothing but violence - Because no matter who you are, wthether you're a highschool stoner, an amphetamine-abusing biker gang member or a pharmacologist working in berekly developing novel catecholaminergic ligands in order to study better the working of the human mind... if you take drugs, you are a danger and a threat to society, and they will respond with all possible force. Free Casey. Free Mitnick. Free your mind.

My Serene Lady

have you ever remembered what you're about to see, two minutes perpendicular to the future?

if not, I strongly suggest trying salvia.